Do You Want Your Friends To Tell You If They Hooked Up With Your Girlfriend In The Past? What About If They Had A Threesome?

Ninety whole minutes today!

What’s on tap? Glad you asked.

Thursday Barstool front page. KFC and Feits are going through the top stories: A couple broke up on a plane causing an emergency landing. Ricin’s Flair has revealed he’s slept with 10,000 women. Kristaps Porzingis is the face of New York sports. Twitter has expanded to 280 characters. Liangelo Ball caught stealing in China. Voicemails include: Do I tell my tinder date I had a threesome with his friend? Spitting chewing tobacco in a girls mouth. If only dudes are hitting on me, should I become gay? Did I peak after losing my virginity? Trying to hook up with the Dick’s Sporting Good’s cashier.

The big one here, for me, is the Tinder date situation. The lady caller (hellooooo, Ms. Lady) finds herself in a bit of a predicament as she’s learned she had a threesome with her new flames friend. She doesn’t know what to do. Cut bait? Let it play out and hope he never learns about it? Tell him? What to do, what to do…

If you ask me, ABSOLUTELY don’t tell him but don’t run and hide either. Just ride the wave, baby. Everything in the whole world is going to come crumbling down eventually, just enjoy it until that happens. Plus, maybe you’ll get lucky and no one will ever say anything, which is always the best course of action. I think that should be a law with threesomes, everyone who partakes signs and unwritten NDA, you form a threesome blood pact. We will never speak of this, we will never tell anyone, especially new love interests, we will take this to our grave… now let’s all take our genitals out and try and cum all over the place.