A Town Is Banning Trick Or Treating For Kids Older Than 15 And Instituting An 8 PM Curfew

Source- A Canadian city is currently under a lot of criticism after recently passing a law that bans a certain age demographic from participating in trick-or-treating. The new approved city law bans anyone over the age of 16 from being involved in the act of trick-or-treating along with a 8 p.m. curfew for those who can. Those caught with a “facial disguise” in public after curfew with any kind of perceived Halloween wardrobe or anyone over 16 found roaming the streets for treats can be fined up to $200.

I went into this blog all ready to whip myself into a frenzy about this law and how this imposed on the basic freedoms of Americans. If you want to walk around and ask the neighbors you never talk to for free snack size candy, it should be your right. Then I realized two things.

1. This town is in Canada.
2. 16 year olds definitely shouldn’t be trick or treating.

First of all, I didn’t know they even celebrated Halloween in Canada let alone. Canucks seem way too polite to get dressed up in scary outfits with the goal to trick each other. But going with an age limit and curfew on Halloween is peak Canada. And that’s before you realize 16 years old and 8 pm wasn’t even the original law on the table.

The crazy thing is that the current law is an modified version of the original that called for the age limit on trick-or-treating to be 14 and the curfew to be 7 p.m. “I wanted to demolish it altogether but I got outvoted,” said the deputy mayor.

One city spokesmen says older residents were concerned about “troublemakers” and that the goal is to ensure public safety.

At that point you don’t even want Halloween. You just want little kids to look cute in costumes for a few hours during the day. Everyone knows Halloween doesn’t really even get cooking until it’s been dark our for a few hours and the empty Barbosol cans litter the streets. Don’t give me this half-measure shit, Canada. Either embrace a night where kids are allowed to act like assholes or cancel Halloween as a whole.

As for 16 year olds getting banned, I actually have no problem with it. For one, the 16 year olds that are usually trick or treating are also the people strolling to the door in all black and douching your house with eggs and shaving cream after they take your candy. Not a costume amongst those assholes. Once you turn 16 and can drive, you should ditch childish shit like trick or treating and should instead begin your journey of turning into a creature relying on foreign substances and hooking up. As you get older, Halloween should go from being about trick or treating to having an excuse to party and watch girls wear costumes that piss their parents off. I am on the other side of that journey now. Those days are long over for your boy Clem. I guess I missed getting a pillowcase full of free candy that always had that smell that could only be recreated from Halloween when I was in high school and college. But once you start working, you can buy your own candy. You don’t have to worry about shlepping around an entire neighborhood and getting poor people candy when you are buying your own candy. Sure you miss out on places like the Casa de Clem that give out the big candy bars (nbd). But once your life is over and you pop out a few kids, you can take them trick or treating and steal all their good candy until they are smart enough to know what the good stuff is.

P.S. I wonder if Tyrone’s friend is going trick or treating this year or if he is still in that coma.

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