Ohio Man Threatens To Shoot Steak N’ Shake Employee Over Bad Sandwich

Via WLWT Cincinnati:

“Police in suburban Cleveland say a fast-food restaurant customer angry about the way his sandwich tasted and looked threatened to shoot somebody over it.

The South Euclid Police Department reported receiving a call Tuesday about a man storming into the Steak ‘n Shake restaurant “acting crazy,” saying he had a gun and was going to shoot someone.

Police say the 20-year-old man complained that the egg on his sandwich was runny and slimy and looked like spit.

He was in custody Wednesday pending a court appearance on an aggravated menacing charge. Police say he didn’t have a gun.”

This isn’t the first time we’ve seen someone act completely irrational on account of a fast food mixup. On Monday we saw a huge brawl in a Texas Taco Bell and earlier this year you may remember this chick getting busted for dropping a little period blood in a customer’s burger. I guess this is only natural in a country whose greatest contributions to society are democracy, fast food, and incredibly lax firearm laws. So natural in fact, that the South Euclid Police Department has gone as far to issue a protocol on what to do when you aren’t satisfied with your order at a fast food restaurant:

Never in my wildest dreams would I have imagined a step by step list for how to act at a fast food joint would be necessary, but let’s digest.

1. Remain Calm

Much easier said than done, EPD. It’s only human nature to become irate when food is ruined due to circumstances beyond your control. For example, 10,000 years ago if someone or something stood in between you and a hot meal, you’d have split their skull open with a rock. Evolution and advances in modern technology have made such drastic responses unnecessary, but the thought still remains. Times may change, but human nature doesn’t.

2. Act Rational

I realize that most errors can be attributed to faulty technology like a shitty intercom or faulty computers in the kitchen, but it’s only natural to assume that whoever is on the other end of that PA system went out of their way to ruin your meal and subsequently, your night. A level of disrespect that anyone who’s ever had an order screwed up at a fast food place (everyone) can relate to.

3. Don’t Make Comments You Will Regret Later

Couldn’t disagree more. When I was like 16 I had several friends who worked fast food joints as summer jobs because there’s not much else a snot nosed 16 year old is capable of doing. Back then, I suppose it’s conceivable that if you popped off to the guy working the window at McDonald’s, you’d run the risk of bumping into him at a house party later that night, but I’m 27 now and I can’t say any of my associates work the line at Steak N’ Shake. No disrespect to anyone who flips burgers for a living, but I make over $15 an hour and I didn’t even have to stage a protest to do so.

Point being, whatever I say to you or whatever you say to me is inconsequential, because we’re never going to see each other ever again.

4. Don’t Take Matters Into Your Own Hands

I actually agree with this one. In a perfect world, you’d storm out of your car, walk up to the counter, cuss out the manager, and walk away with several free meals and cute chick from the table behind you’s number, but unfortunately we don’t live in a perfect world. Instead, you’ll probably pull away from the drive through window, realize you a frisco melt instead of a double steakburger, proceed to shout obscenities that would probably ruin a career if anyone ever found out, but not actually take the time to turn around and do anything about it. 9 times out of 10 I’m hitting the fast food joint, it’s more because of the ‘fast’ part and not the ‘food’ part. No way I’m taking extra time out of my day to go back and get my order fixed.

5. When the Police Arrive Be Cooperative

I’ll never encourage running from the police because a.) Running puts human lives in danger and the cops already have a hard enough job as is, and b.) It’s illegal. That being said, if you’re ever in a restaurant and you’re so unruly that the staff decides legal intervention is the only logical choice, leave the cheeseburgers and high tail it the fuck out of there. Don’t look back.

@QuineTime

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