Mount Francesa Erupts After Matt Harvey Gets Shelled And Yoenis Cespedes Gets Injured

It’s not even May and we’ve already reached the point where Matt Harvey has made Mike Francesa audibly angry. At least his “Dark Knight looks like Cinderella” rant came before the 2015 playoffs when people were going crazy about him being on an innings limit.

But today’s was raw and uncut to the gut. Black Knight (huh), Dark Knight, Good night! Vintage Francesca. I can’t even imagine what Mike would be like as a Mets fan. Probably dead to be honest. I don’t think his blood pressure could handle this type of stress. He went crazy enough during the Joba Rules days. Mike’s head not exploding during the ANDY PETTITTE IS A STAHTING PITCHAH rant is one of the biggest surprises in internet history.

Just being a fanboy of Harvey before things went sour drives him up a wall. I don’t think he would be able to handle days like today. Noah’s hurt. Yo’s hurt. Harvey shits the bed. And the Mets drop both games against the Braves before a series with the Nats. Today was the vintage Mets perfect storm we get 4-5 times a year. Earlier this month I compared Opening Day to the first day of middle school. Everyone’s dressed nice and excited to see each other for the first time in a while. You forget about all the shitty parts of school. The early mornings. The pop quizzes. The classes you can’t stay awake in out of pure boredom. Well we just had a doozy of a day Mets fans. Failed a couple of tests, our girlfriend broke up with us, and we got shoved in a locker by an old bully. Today SUCKED and tomorrow doesn’t get any easier.

And shout out to that motherfucker Ray Ramirez. Guy butchered his handling of Noah AND his handling of Yo. Only our best arm and bat. Unfuckingbelievable.

Fuck me.

On the bright side, I think I found a place crazier than #MetsTwitter. Because if the rest of #MetsFacebook is anywhere as crazy as Janet, I have found a new place to wallow in Mets misery.

Then again, Midnight Frankie is doing his job perfectly on Twitter. I officially think the F in KFC stands for FrankFleming.

At least this video of a caller pranking Mike can make me smile. I’m just happy he didn’t act like he knew who Saracen was by saying duh kid with good charactuh even though Mike was really getting played like Michael Scott during the Grief Counseling episode of The Office.