How Many Of Kmarko's Girl Scout Cookies Am I Allowed To Eat Today Because He Took A Snow Day?
I’m pretty sure Keith put them in direct line of my desk just to taunt me.
So as you probably know from the News/Facebook Updates/Twitter, it’s snowing today in New York City. And because it is snowing half the office isn’t here, including one of the hardest working guys we have (this is not sarcasm) kmarko. Not a big deal right? We’re bloggers, we can blog from anywhere. Well yes, except for one small little caveat, Kmarko has had 6 boxes of Girl Scout Cookies sitting on his desk for the past week. In addition, Keith is one of those weirdos that can control how much he eats, only having a couple of cookies a day. He has this superhuman ability to eat until he’s full and then stop eating, crazy right? So the cookies have been sitting there with barely a dent put in them for the past 4 days, all the while I’ve been stalking them like a lion, watching how many he eats, what time he eats them, will he offer me one, can I take a box without him noticing, you know genuine thoughts that go through a person’s head when they are in a staredown with some cookies.
So back to today, Keith is not here, I am here and so are his cookies. Their protector has left them to fend for themselves. Keith basically is an absentee parent that left 10 dollars on the kitchen counter and told his little children to fend for themselves all weekend. Trouble is brewing, I know it, Keith knows it, and most importantly the Cookies know it. So the million dollar question is this. How many cookies can I eat without doing irrepeable damage to my friendship with Keith? At the time of this writing I have already had 11 cookies. I was thinking as long as I stay under the 30 mark I should be good. Open new boxes, spread them out, maybe even eat some of those gross do-si-dos to make it believable.
So what does everyone think? How many cookies am I allowed to eat? I know this sounds silly but we blog about real issues at Barstool and this is the most real issue in my life today so I would appreciate it if everyone gave me a real response and took this seriously.
PS
PFT and I also stole Feitelberg’s dip and have had half a tin already today. We’re just pretending that the office is a prison yard today, no rules. Anything that is out in the open is ours, fair is fair, next up the bag of Cheetos on Riggs desk.