BREAKING: Do I Need To Go To The Emergency Room?

So it’s Aloha Friday in the office and I’m just sitting here cranking out blogs. Enjoying lunch with my coworkers. Pretty casual day, nothing crazy. Wrote about South Korea, Zuckerberg, and some hugs in Charlotte. Then outta nowhere Max here drops this bomb on me. Are my bananaland eyes a sign of serious health issues? Does my right eye living out in la la land mean I’m suffering the same health issues as Hillary? Am I gonna start seizuring up during interviews and getting stuffed into vans by my crew after fainting at 9/11 memorials? Do I have pneumonia / am I actually a 68-year-old woman?

Tough questions for anyone to face. Always believed the maximum setbacks from my eyeball situation would be that I’d be the butt of a few Portnoy jokes or maybe scare a new female roommate into locking herself in her bedroom for a week or two. Nothing too major. But serious health problems? Didn’t see that coming… but then again I never really see anything coming. Probably should go to the ER but after my C grade from Nardini and coworker Dave think I have to stay here and grind it out. Blog never sleeps. Content content content. Am I in serious danger? Looks like it, but at some point you just have to accept your fate.

If I die, I die.