I Don't Think That Pres Should Fire Clem
Listen, I realized once Barstool was opening its HQ in the city, I was going to be fucked. I have a house and a family in the burbs and those two things don’t just disappear unless you ignore them for a long time. Blogging is a young man’s game and I’m doing all I can to hang around. In fact, the commute to the city is one of the things that pushed me to blogging smut and ruining my family’s good name so I could work at home for internet dollars.
But sacrificing time and sleep and happiness #fortheblog seems like the right thing to do so I could support said family. Yes I knew I was walking into a hornets nest of an office where every move I make is on camera and there has already been an unannounced random that could have shot up the entire office. Yes I knew that I would go from working in the comfort of my own home to mingling with people like this every morning.
But today also marked the first battle of Pres’ Bagels vs. KFC’s Donuts, and I sure as fuck wasn’t going to miss that. Plus I can dress like a pseudo homeless person at work, so it’s not all that bad.
I also thought maybe the Stoolies would help me pay for a studio close by because we have the best fans in the universe (again, that Venmo is TheClemReport). Shout out to everyone that has already donated. I’m not quite at the “studio apartment level” but I’m definitely at the “can eat my feelings away for a few weeks at the late-night Wendy’s drive thru once I actually get home” level.
So what does this all mean? It means I am going to suck it up and keep commuting. Will I ask Dave if I can occasionally work from home? Probably. If he says no, will I ask for a Leesa mattress in the office so I can crash in the city a couple of nights a week? Definitely.
Also, we started a caption contest using my sign and I’m sure all the Stoolies will be very kind and respectful with their entries. Tweet @TheClemReport and @KFCBarstool with the hashtage #CommuterClem.
Here are the leaders in the clubhouse right now:
P.S. I realized that I completely boned the sign by putting my Venmo name in tiny letters. But it was also my third attempt at writing the sign and we were almost out of poster board. Thank God the internet isn’t handwritten.