The Prodigal Dario Saric Returns And The Sixers' Top 10 Summer League Plays

CSN — The wait will be over this week. Dario Saric will sign with the Sixers on Friday, according to a source.The Sixers acquired Saric two years ago on draft night in a trade with the Orlando Magic, who selected him 12th overall. Since then, the 22-year-old forward from Croatia has been playing for Anadolu Efes in Istanbul. According to international basketball reporter David Pick, the buyout for Saric’s current overseas contract — which had one year remaining — is $1.1 million. Per the CBA, the Sixers can pay up to $650,000 of it while Saric must pay the rest. There had been uncertainty as to when Saric would join the Sixers. Given the NBA’s rookie salary scale, there are financial benefits for Saric to remain overseas for another year. But following the Olympic Qualifiers last weekend, he told reporters he intended to play in Philadelphia next season.

It’s finally happening. Two years after he got drafted, Dario Saric is putting ink to paper officially to become a Sixer. The Sixers will send out four super-skilled non-Americn rookies this year and Sam Hinkie’s is somewhere petting a falcon on a hill overseeing the chaos he hath wrought.

Saric (pronounced SHAH-ric, not SAR-ic, an exciting new fact) has been busy dominating in the Olympic qualifiers over the likes of Danilo Gallinari and Giannis Antetokounmpo. Saric’s myth is as mighty as his mustache; he’s not gonna play above the rim but he is skilled. He’s a great passer and by some sorcery HE DOESNT EVEN HAVE TO LOOK AT THE MAN HE’S PASSING TO.

To get a sense of Saric’s innovation, look no further than his facial hair. Case in point.

That rare beauty of a mustache is a sight to behold. The Reverse Hitler. Saric obviously carries such a deep seeded disdain for the Führer that he even refuses to grow his lip strip where ol’ Adolf was sprouting follicles. He might not be American, but my God is that patriotic.

Saric is paying close to half a million dollars of his own buyout, which shows just how badly he wants to play in America, even considering Philly’s crowded front court. And while he’s not putting himself in the best position, he gave his word and stuck by it.

That’s some good character from the Croatian Saric, especially considering the perception of Croatians as notorious complainers. From #CroatianProblems:

Translates to: “I just got a job and summer is approaching. Sigh.”

Translates to: “I don’t even have time to finish my cigarette.”

Translates to: “I can’t seem to get the doctor alone so I can give him a bottle of whiskey.”

A grim scene indeed. One can see why Saric would be eager to flee this hellhole where you gotta work in the summer, where you can’t finish sucking down some sweet heat on a smoke break, and where you can’t get the goddamn doctor alone so you can give him some Slivovitz, which is, of course, Croatia’s top whiskey.

Good news Dario. They NBA takes off in the summer, our smoke breaks are bountiful, and if you have single payer, you can damn near pay your doctor with Jack Daniels.

Welcome to America.

Meanwhile summer league basketball plugs along, and in Philly that means a whole hell of a lot more than it does everywhere else in the league. The games in Utah and Vegas have no bearing on the season, but honestly, this is all we have. The default setting of the Sixers fan is an anticipatory one, so this whole summer league run has been spank bank material, with an eye towards potential even moreso than results.

We get it, unless you’re a Nets or Lakers fan, your team has more important things to worry about. Things like “the actual season” or “making the playoffs”, but those terms aren’t exactly in our lexicon yet. We know all this, and we’re going to go ahead an get over-excited over here, so just let us have that.

The Sixers got bounced from the tourney in Vegas, effectively ending basketball activities until the preseason, but we can still take a whistful look at the summer that was. And so without further ado, the top 10 plays of the Sixers summer league.

10.

Including a play where there was no actual basket is a microcosm of Sixers basketball, but look at the handles, the spin, the pass.

9.

Another non finish, but the man literally has eyes in the back of his head, literal 20/20 vision eagle eyes, literally.

8.

Had to mix in a little non-Simmons. Richuan Holmes has been a shot blocking machine, which should ease the loss of Nerlens Noel, should that happen. Noel has been conspicuously absent this summer, despite the presence of Big Jah, Embiid and other young veterans.

7.

Ben didn’t really show off his scoring prowess this summer, but to know he has these kind of hops in the arsenal is reassuring. I almost included one of his midrange jumpers, but that would have been overkill.

6.

Passing.

5.

Always passing. There are five more just like this and there just wasn’t room on the list or all the wizardry.

4.

Christian Wood had a hell of a summer league and was a long shot to see time in our big man rotation. Good on him getting two years with the Hornets.

3.

This was the play where all Sixers fans fell in love with Ben. You always remember that first moment.

2.

Consider everything that went on in this one second of decision making. Simmons saw the guy behind him cutting, decided to make the pass, saw the defender, decided to pump fake the pass, then decided to make the pass anyway after shaking the defender, as well as TLC, who was cutting. Nothing makes me feel like an simpleton as breaking down the split second decisions of a genius.

1.

Not a Ben Simmons play, but when you jump over a man to dunk, that equates to special treatment ’round here.

The whole damn thing has me laughing to the bank.

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