Guy Writes Into Dear Amy Using The Keith Hernandez Storyline From Seinfeld. Dear Amy Bashes The Keith Hernandez Character. So I Kindly Respond
Dear Amy,
Why don’t you shut your face and show some respect to the 1979 NL MVP. The man is a leader, a lover, a champion, and a gentleman. While you are in your ivory tower telling people what to do, Keith is birdwatching and talking Mets fans off the ledge. Have you ever seen a tufted titmouse during the New York summer? I didn’t think so. But it’s breathtaking. And the amount of people that would have jumped off the Whitestone Bridge the last five years without Keith would be in the six-figure range if we didn’t have his stories to make us laugh.
And don’t give me that opportunist bullshit. He only lied about taking Elaine out because he didn’t want to hurt Jerry’s feelings. That’s a true friend. I mean have you even see Julia Louis-Dreyfus lately? She ages like the finest of wines put here on God’s green Earth. I would be mad if my own brother DIDN’T skip my wedding, funeral, or any other type of important moment in my life because he had an outside chance of cuddling between the sheets with Elaine Benes.
Then again, we never did see Keith on Seinfeld again. So maybe he is a wham, bam, thank you ma’am friend. But just saying you are friends with Keith Hernandez would make the hell that is moving worth it. And hats off to Feeling Foolish for this letter, which reminded me of the scene from The Office when they act like the plots of Million Dollar Baby and The Lion King are part of their lives. I need Dear Amy to get flooded with ridiculous Seinfeld stories every week now.
(And in case you needed a refresher/just wanted an excuse to watch some Seinfeld clips in the cube)