Linesman Takes A 121 MPH Serve Directly In The Dick

This is like when you have that awkward exchange in the office, when you’re walking towards someone and you do the “you go that way, I’ll go this way, no you go that way thing” then end up bumping into each other. Guy was doing his best, he was trying to make an athletic play and then he shuffled DIRECTLY into the ball’s path. 121 miles per hour right on the tip of the penis. Someone give this poor fuck a fixed match to bet on or something because as bad as the ball to the dick was, the ooooohs from the crowd were somehow even worse. Just 5,000 people knowing you’ll be grasping for breathe with that deep stomach feeling for the next 15 minutes. Think you have to shit but nope, just your balls mangled halfway to Sunday. No feeling worse.

By the way, if I were ever in this situation I would absolutely make them stretcher me off. This is your moment, this is your time to shine. If you get drilled in the dick and you’re not part of the game you make yourself a part of the game. I’m talking ambulance on the court like it’s Madden ’92. You’re a tennis linesman for christ sakes. Besides a sick grab this is your only chance.