Because They're Brilliant Titans Of Industry, RadioShack Has Named Nick Cannon As Their Chief Creative Officer

(Source) — RadioShack filed for bankruptcy a while back but, thanks to the deep pockets of the folks over at Standard General, a few stores will remain open. The retailer is trying to rebrand itself and its latest move is appointing TV personality Nick Cannon as its Chief Creative Officer. Cannon will work with RadioShack to create a line of exclusive products, curate music and even organize special performances and events. The retailer will also focus on its educational and STEM (science, tech, engineering and math) initiatives. There’s been no official announcement as to what kind of exclusive products RadioShack and Cannon will come up with, but it better be revolutionary if the retailer hopes to forge a new, relevant identity.

I’m quite sure that RadioShack has filed for bankruptcy roughly 10,000 times so it’s about time they made a step in the right direction when it comes to business. You need the face of your franchise to represent your company as a whole, it’s like a living, breathing mission statement. Drake and Apple work because they’re both as mainstream as it gets. Brady and Tag Heuer work because they’re both sexy and never crack under pressure. Subway has RGIII which is perfect because they both fucking suck. RadioShack finally understands that and has hooked up with Nick Cannon: two things that are from the 90s, obsolete, and every time people see it they think “Wait, that’s still a thing?” Match made in heaven. Buy your RSHCQ stock now because this ship is turning around.

PS – How hard has Nick Cannon had it when he can’t even beat fucking Nick Carter on a “nick c…” Google autofill. Is Nick Carter even still alive?