Twister, Super Soaker, And Puppets Inducted Into The Toy Hall of Fame

 

RochesterThe National Toy Hall of Fame welcomed a new class of classics on Thursday morning. Twister, Super Soaker and the puppet were selected to be the next inductees into the hall inside The Strong museum. They were chosen from among finalists that included: the spinning top, coloring book, Wiffle Ball, American Girl dolls, Battleship, Jenga, PLAYMOBIL, the scooter and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Toys are honored for their longevity and ability to foster learning, creativity or discovery through play.

Well there you have it. After much debate and discussion about who was snubbed and who’s a first ballot Hall Of Famer, Twister, Super Soaker, and The Puppet get the nod. For reference, here was my breakdown of all this year’s candidates. Out of the 12 nominees, my #1, #6 and #9 ranked toys got in:

9. Puppet

More poor people shit. I mean dont get me wrong, everyone has thrown a sock on and turned it into a puppet. Hell, Mankind made sock puppets HOT in the streets in the late 90s. But at the end of the day its a sock, not a toy. Like I also used to make shadow puppets with my hands and the sun. Is the sun a toy? I dont think so. The sun is a giant gaseous ball of fire. Puppets are for Poors. Requires too much imagination.

6. Twister

Twister has been on the ballot since 2010. It was a finalist in 2011. Always a Bridesmaid, never a Bride is Twister. And the reason is that people really like the IDEA of twister. Not the actual execution of Twister. When you’re young it sounds like fun and then after a few minutes of contorting yourself like an idiot you’re like “Lets just go play video games.” As an adult you have some perverted ideas where you’re gonna play Twister with chicks and you’re gonna end up fucking 69’ing them right there on that plastic sheet and all that happens is you risk tearing an ACL. Twister will be the Bert Blyleven – they will get in eventually. Not this year though. Competition too stiff.

1. Super Soaker

What I always say about this masterpiece – “Probably the most perfect toy of all time. The Super Soaker 50 was literally the perfect water gun. The air pressure was a game changer. It was much bigger than the little mini squirt guns you used to have to dunk under water to fill up. But not too big that you couldn’t run around with it. Best summer time toy of all time.”

Just a horrendous, horrendous job by the Toy Voting Association. WIFFLE BALL gets snubbed in favor of fucking puppets???? Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is on the outside looking in while Twister heads to the Hall??? Putrid. This is worse than Mike Piazza getting snubbed from Cooperstown. I mean well done with Super Soaker but that was like a no brainer. An idiot who’s never even played with toys could take one look at the Super Soaker 50 and tell you thats the perfect toy. How you can understand the value of Super Soaker and not elect WIFFLE BALL is mind blowing. Wiffle is like a fucking way of life. Its a toy, a game, and a sport all wrapped up into one. You play it on the beach you play it at a barbecue you play it in the backyard. It transcends simply “toys.” Just a PISS POOR effort by the Toy Hall of Fame. There was easily 4 or 5 more worthy toys than fucking Puppets and Twister.

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