I Was Once An Informant For The FBI…
When I discovered that one of my neighbors was dealing hard drugs and entertaining seedy characters at his home, I needed to do something about it. I had three young children then (early '90s), and the quiet, middle-class neighborhood was full of young kids who needed someone to step up and keep them safe.
For several years, I was friendly with the guy in question, drinking an occasional beer and burning a fatty with him. Once we caught a buzz, we'd tell some stories and some lies. He was a great storyteller, and we always had a lot of fun together.
He had a vintage British sports car, an Aston Martin, James Bonds' first car, and we’d take it down the highway towards the Cape. At one point, we’d be traveling close to 120mph. The faster we went, the smoother the engine ran. But that never stopped me from saying, “Is that all she got?”
He’d say, "Hold my beer.” Then he'd hand me his beer, focus on the road, and take it up close to a buck forty…
Sean Connery as James Bond standing in front of his Aston Martin
Then, there was a sudden change in his personality. He became distant and flippant. People he worked with said he started using cocaine. We rarely spoke after that.
One morning, when he wasn't home, his dog got loose and attacked my dog. When I talked to him later that day about the incident, we almost got into a fistfight on his front stairs. After he threatened my family and me, and I’d like to believe it was the cocaine talking, I had no choice but to file a restraining order. He was beyond out of control.
When I spoke to local police about the potential drug dealing he was doing from his house, they said they needed hard evidence to put him under surveillance, and given that I had none, they couldn’t get involved. That’s when they suggested I call the FBI…
Once I was connected to an FBI agent and gave them my neighbor's name and address, they were quick to tell me, "The man in question is already under FBI investigation," which was quite shocking.
They asked me if I would become an informant and help them keep track of the traffic at his home. I wasn’t sure I wanted to get in that deep; he was a one-time friend, but when I thought about the consequences of doing nothing and then there being a bigger problem in the neighborhood, I agreed to become an informant. I wasn't exactly one of the G-Men, but I was working with the FBI.
First, I had to choose a code name. I went with Ed. When I called in, I identified myself as “Ed from Norton,” a play on The Honeymooners’ character Ed Norton, a New York City municipal sewer worker played by actor Art Carney, who's pictured here with his best friend Ralph Kramden, a New York City bus driver played by Jackie Gleason.
My job was to call in twice weekly with the license plates of anyone pulling into my neighbor's driveway, providing the times they arrived and departed. I took my job seriously. I was vigilant.
The FBI told me only that the license plate numbers I provided were helpful, but nothing else about the case they were building against my neighbor.
When he was eventually arrested, it was for a weapons charge and not anything related to the FBI case. During his trial, however, the FBI’s records containing all the seedy characters frequenting his house became part of the evidence against him.
Once he was convicted and sentenced, the FBI called to thank me and told me 'Ed from Norton' was no longer an active FBI informant…
Saturday night I was downtown
Working for the FBI
Sittin' in a nest of bad men
Whiskey bottles piling high
Bootlegging boozer on the west side
Full of people who are doing wrong
Just about to call up the DA man
When I heard this woman sing a song…