John Stamos Bravely Wears Bald Cap In Solidarity With Full House Co-Star Dave Coulier, Who Has Been Diagnosed With An Aggressive Form Of Cancer
Touching moment between former Hollywood roommates. John Stamos is a man of hair. Dave Coulier is a man of stage 3 Hodgkins Lymphoma. In a beautiful act of solidarity, to show his good friend Dave that he's got his back. Despite John Stamos' entire life being built on the back of his great hair. Despite his thick luscious locks being the most important thing in the world to him. Something he's used to seeing in the mirror every day. Something that gives him confidence in himself and defines the man that he his today. Despite how immensely important Stamos' hair is to him and his career... when his good friend Dave Coulier was diagnosed with an aggressive form of cancer... ride or die John Stamos bravely put on a bald cap and took a picture for the world to see.
I mean, what did you expect? That John Fucking Stamos was actually going to shave his head? Are you crazy? Do you know how hard he's worked for that beautiful mane?
It's not like Dave Coulier is his literal brother or something. They were co-stars on a TV show in the 90's. Sure, Stamos will spend a day in hair & makeup, throw on a bald cap, and touch up the edges in photoshop for a cute post. He'll graciously give Dave Coulier a few hours of his time. But he's not going to jeopardize his career. Oikos Greek Yogurt could need him for a commercial at any moment. They can't have a bald bitch as the face of their brand. That's ridiculous.
In all seriousness, two things are true here. Anybody who is actually upset with John Stamos for not fully shaving his head… calm down. There's a good chance Stamos is in the middle of filming something right now where he contractually can't just shave his entire head. I was half joking in the paragraph above, but his hair is legitimately his career. Which I suppose would make it all the more heartwarming gesture if he actually went through with it… But still. Calm down hypothetical people who Twitter assures me are furious about this. It's a nice picture. I'm sure Dave appreciates it.
On the other hand… Stamos should have known how this was going to look. Shaving your head in solidarity with a friend or family member diagnosed with cancer is a very common thing to do. It happens in high schools and offices around the world every day. So making a "we're in this together" Instagram post because you put on a bald cap for a couple hours and let a photo of you appearing bald to circle the internet… while Dave Coulier's entire life has been flipped upside down… while he's sitting right there being real-life bald and battling an aggressive, life threatening disease. You gotta know how that looks, John! The shaving your head in solidarity thing works because the people shaving their heads are making a sacrifice so that their friend with cancer who's embarrassed about being bald will now have a gang of friends who are bald with him. That's a nice thing to do. Putting on a bald cap isn't really a sacrifice. You're kind of just stealing bald valor at that point.
But maybe that's perfectly on brand for John Stamos. What they clearly should have done is make a joke out of it. They should have done a video where Stamos shows up in the bald cap, acting like he shaved his head to show support. Dave is so appreciative. He proceeds to shave Dave's head. Then the camera cuts and Stamos rips off the bald cap and says, "Are you fucking nuts, Dave? You thought I actually shaved my head? You know how hard I work for this hair? Look how stupid your head looks. I'm perfectly healthy I can't do that" … then he runs a comb through his hair, throws his arm around a chick with big cans and rides off on a motorcycle.
Either something like that, or maybe just don't go the bald route at all. Maybe just find a different way to support your pal.