"Go Suck Another Dirty Dick", Spirit Airlines Employees Lash Out As Their Once Thriving Airline Moves Towards Bankruptcy
It's truly criminal what's happened to Spirit Airlines. They saw their pending bankruptcy coming from a mile away. But they had an out. JetBlue was set to acquire them for $3.6 billion. Until the Department of Justice stepped in and blocked the deal because Alexandria Oritz-Ramirez was merely 20,000 points away from receiving a $100 flight voucher through her Spirit Saver$ Club membership.
And look where we are now. Spirit Airlines is moving towards bankruptcy. Was it worth it government? Was it worth losing moments like this. Spirit Airlines employees publicly accusing each other of dirty dick sucking in front of paying customers. That's what traveling on a budget is all about. For the lowest air fares on the market, not only would Spirit Airlines most likely get you to your destination on time, but passengers are guaranteed to witness and/or participate in at minimum one physical altercation for every 500 miles flown. You won't find a deal like that anywhere else. And soon enough, it's all going to be gone.
Jokes aside, I will continue to beat the drum for Spirit until the day their planes have been scrapped for metal and sold for fentanyl. I've been flying Spirit my whole life, and not once have I had a problem. Is that just pure luck? Almost certainly. But I can only go on personal experience. Spirit has been deemed by the world to be the #1 shitty airline of all the shitty airlines (of which there are many), and that is unjust. There's even metrics to prove it. If you search Google long enough, and don't mind sifting through pop-up ads, you'll find an article on Sunset.com that says WalletHub conducted a study based on 13 categories where Spirit Airlines ranks 3rd best among major U.S. airlines.
Sunset - WalletHub analyzed nine of the largest U.S. airlines and one regional carrier based on 13 categories. The verdict is in: Alaska Airlines flies above the rest, scoring 68.07 out of 100.
Check out the rest of the rankings:
- Alaska Airlines: 68.07
- SkyWest Airlines: 65.96
- Spirit Airlines: 65.69
- Delta Air Lines: 61.56
- United Airlines: 51.96
- JetBlue Airways: 51.60
- Hawaiian Airlines: 48.30
- American Airlines: 46.52
- Frontier Airlines: 43.57
- Southwest Airlines: 36.03
And I'm not even sure SkyWest Airlines is real. If you take a look at the WalletHub study, you'll see that among the 13 categories, Spirit ranks 2nd in mishandled baggage, and 1st in affordability, age of fleet, and safety.
They're not even dead last in cancelled or delayed flights. It will be a travesty if Spirit can't survive its current financial troubles. The blood is on the hands of not only our government, but of all the people of the internet who constantly disparage their good name, because they can't handle a little turmoil between beefing employees. Or the occasional pre-boarding fist fight. Or the occasional raccoon falling from the ceiling.
Shame on all of you. Long live Spirit Airlines.