Rita Ora Finally Addresses the Throuple Make Out Photos Featuring Her, Tessa Thompson and Taika Waititi

As bad as Taika Waititi's Thor: Love and Thunder was, and IMO it was awful - misguided, tone deaf, filled with slapstick and forced jokes that didn't land and reduced the Norse God of Thunder into an infantile, half-witted buffoon - I was willing to forgive him. For a lot of reasons. Not the least of which is his past work. Thor: Ragnarok was great. Jojo Rabbit helped bring back the lost Hollywood art of making comedy out of terrible, uncomfortable, horrifying events, proving once again that satire is mightier than the sword. Love and Thunder just sort of got away from him. The way things sometimes do when an artist is getting universally praised and egos run amok. It happens.  

But I also gave the man a pass because he's earned it off the movie set. In May of 2021, to be exact:

As Hubbs later discovered, the bosses at Marvel didn't have a sense of humor about the director of two of their biggest budget films having public balcony threesomes with one of their Top 10 female leads:

But those Puritans from Disney can piss all the way off. If our actors can't make out with multiple actresses at the same time, what's the point of being a rich and famous movie star? Expressing yourself artistically? Pffft. We have bloggers for that. We want our celebrities doing the things the rest of us would like to do ourselves but can't, because of stupid committed relationships and being guilted into dumbass, boring monogamy.

I bring this up because one of the slices of bread in that Taika sandwich has finally broken her silence. And unfortunately, we all wish she'd continued to exercise her right to remain silent:

Source - Rita Ora has finally addressed the 'throuple' rumours with her husband Taika Waititi and Tessa Thompson after they were spotted kissing and cuddling at a party.

The singer, 32, who married her Thor director husband, 47, last year, broke her silence on suggestions that the threesome were in a relationship at the time.

Dispelling any 'throuple rumours', Rita said: 'Have you ever been in a situation where you've had a lot of drinks and everyone's your best friend? …

She told GQ magazine: 'Literally – that [photo] was just a bunch of friends having a good time. They [Taika and Tessa] had a crazy schedule and everyone was letting loose.'

Alright. I'm going to stop you right there, Missy. This is not what we want to hear. Everyone was tired and happy drunk and blowing off steam or whatever. We poors don't get to do that. We work hard and let loose too, but it doesn't end up with our wives making out with another woman and us at the same time. Even suggesting it will get your average suburban husband a night in the luxurious LaQuinta in, no expenses paid. Not to mention permanent sideeye from all the other couples. And you'll have seen the last of the Facebook invites to the Ugly Sweater parties. When the doorbell don't ring on Halloween, you'll know it's them. 

So all we ask is that our celebrities act in such a way we get to live vicariously through them. Is that so hard? At the very least, if we think you're doing these things, don't feel the need to set us straight, thanks. Never let the truth get in the way of a good story, is my motto. Now what seemed like a great mini-scandal is just reduced to an ordinary, run-of-the-mill sloppy drunk fest. Thanks for crushing our hopes, Rita. 

The tragedy here is that if this was say, 60 years ago, and our actors were all guys like Sinatra and the Rat Pack, this would've been a genuine orgy. The kind America could be proud of. What the 2020s need is a better class of celebrity.