The Jets And Colts Delivered The Worst Bad Beats Of The Entire NFL Season Just Minutes Apart In Week 18

Hahahahahahahaha.

It's that tired, world-weary seasoned bettor who sits by during times like these, sequestered away in some corner of some bar where all the NFL games are playing, knowing they're about to get fucking destroyed.

"I've seen it all." That's the common refrain of the betting broken. Sure does apply here. 

Colts -3, Jets +3.5. WOWWWW.

Davis Mills heaves a 4th and 20 prayer that a Colts defensive back can't have the decency to come up with. Touchdown. Cover. Ballgame. Oh, and Houston gives up the No. 1 overall pick in the 2023 NFL Draft. Only adds to the hilarity.

THEN THERE WAS THE JETS. They tried all these bass-ackward laterals and eventually fucked around and hurt their overall ATS record. You're not playing for much else at this point, gents. What did you hope to accomplish!?

For most of that final sequence I was just waiting for an accident to happen. Once the statuesque Joe Flacco had the ball, it was a full-on panic scream of, "NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!" And for good reason. Because look what happened.

Oh yeah, and Elijah Moore...

Like as if your season wasn't disappointing enough. You went and ended it like that. Wowza.

I actually got murdered earlier in the year on this play that was eerily reminiscent of what happened in that Fins-Jets shit show.

…That caused me to whiff on this Barstool Sportsbook boosted parlay because of the score going OVER with literally zero time on the clock:

I don't fuck with Over/Under lines nearly as much as spreads, so today's beat was worse for me — especially on the heels of having the Colts -3!! In fact, I've been picking every single game ATS this NFL season. Even with what I can only categorize as an utter collapse toward the end, I still entered this week 130-120-4 YTD.

Yours truly is no stranger to bad ATS beats this season, lemme tell ya. Particularly of late. Like I said, been a STRUGGLE down the stretch.

All you can do is laugh. And follow my snakebitten ass on the social medias because I think I'm due to return to form for the playoffs. No losing weeks picking every NFL game through Week 13!!

Twitter @MattFitz_gerald/TikTok