Danny Playoffs: A Tribute, as Amendola Retires

There are several ways I'll remember Danny Amendola's career in New England, from this now until the day I finally go off to my final reward, killed while saving a group of nuns and orphans from a Grizzly attack as I and the bear fight for hours to a near standstill before I finally look him in the eye and say, "You bested me. Now I die an honorable death. Til we meet in the afterlife, fare thee well, old friend." (At least that's how I picture it.) 

The first thing I'll always think about at the mention of Amendola's name is his stellar, transcendent performances at crucial moments in the postseason, which I will get to shortly. The second will be how all his stellar, transcendent performances at crucial moments in the postseason were thrown right in the collective face of the legion of imbeciles who ripped him and the Patriots for signing him when he first came here in 2013. 

Oh, I will never forget the level of vitriol directed at that signing. Amendola was vilified for committing the unpardonable sin of being brought in to "replace" Wes Welker. He'd signed for five years, $28 million, with $10 million guaranteed. At a time when Welker had become a media darling for standing up to that evil despot GM Bill Belichick, who cruelly forced him to sign his franchise tag. Welker had become an expensive habit in Foxboro. As one writer told me, "Bill loved him as a $3 million player, but hated him at $9 million." And Amendola was seen by anti-Patriots jihadists, sports radio influencers, and their legions of vapid, misinformed cult followers as the man trying to fill the shoes of The Man. And they were convinced he would fail. 

Worse - unforgivably, really - they accused him of being soft. The class of easily replaceable twats who take their showers before work and define the term "non-essential personnel," took to the media with nicknames like "Danny Glass" or "Danny Glassendola" or whatever because with the Rams, he had missed five games the season before and all but one the year before that. Whereas Welker was the Indestructible Man. Or at least, had the common decency to blow out his ACL on a non-contact play on the final game of the regular season in 2009, so he only missed one playoff blowout loss. 

Here's a description of how "soft" Amendola was prior to coming to New England: 

On October 4, 2012, Amendola suffered a dislocated clavicle in the second quarter of the game versus the Arizona Cardinals. In a rare case, instead of popping out, the clavicle popped in and came millimeters from puncturing his trachea and aorta, which could have killed him. Rams' medical staff called around the league for information, but no teams reported ever having a player suffer a similar injury. Amendola was anesthetized before popping the clavicle back into place. Due to the unusual nature of the injury the Rams were not certain when Amendola would return,but he was able to recover after just three weeks and recorded 11 catches for 102 yards in a hard-fought tie with the San Francisco 49ers.He finished the season with 804 total yards, including 666 yards on 63 receptions and 122 yards on 17 punt returns.

Yup. A real marshmallow alright. 

The backlash only got worse after his first game as a Patriot, when he carried them to a close win at Buffalo with a 10-catch, 104 yard performance that ended early when he suffered a groin tear. From the talk show callers, you would've thought he was running a comic book shop and mentoring Bruce Willis to be a superhero.

(I'm not sure if I should've issued an Obscure Reference alert before that one. But it stays.) 

With that severe groin tear, Amendola was out all of three weeks. By the beginning of November, he was lighting up the Steelers for 122 yards in a 55-31 win. In December, he dropped 133 on Miami. But stats with him were never his true measure. In his five years in New England, he never had more than 65 receptions or more than 650 yards in a season. It was never really demanded of him on a team that had Rob Gronkowski, an emerging Julian Edelman and James White. What they did need him to do was come up huge in the biggest moments. And that's where he earned every penny of his salary. (Even as he took pay cut after team-friendly paycut.) 

In 13 career postseason games, all with the Patriots, his teams went 10-3. He caught 57 balls on 81 targets, a percentage of 70.4%, with 704 yards, six touchdowns and a yards per reception average that was almost 2.5 Y/R higher than his regular season career average. 

But I say again, it wasn't about the numbers with Amendola. It was about the moments. Lots and lots of moments. The advanced stats guys who argue there is no such thing as "clutch" will fake that their phone just rang and they have to take this call whenever you bring up Danny Playoffs' heroic feats. 

None more famous that being on the pointy end of the javelin that Edelman threw him on a double pass to erase Baltimore's second 14-point lead in the 2014 Divisional round game:

Which he followed up on a few weeks later in the 4th quarter against the Legion of Boom, turning a 10-point deficit into a 3-point game:

Then in the middle of the NFL's all time "Have to Have It" scenarios, with the Pats trying to come back from down 28-3 and left with positively zero margin for error, Brady looked to Amendola:

A few seasons later came perhaps his finest hour. Facing yet another 10-point 4th quarter deficit against an elite defense, he scored twice against Jacksonville in the AFC championship game:

Unfortunately he couldn't carry the Patriots to the championship that year, despite his exemplary, team best, 8-catch, 152-yard, 19.0 YPC performance against Philadelphia in Super Bowl LII. But he left his mark on history nonetheless:

And I haven't even begun to scratch the surface of what he accomplished off the field, dating a Miss Universe:

… and becoming besties with the universe's most celebrated Patriots author. 

All in all, not a bad string of accomplishments for an undrafted, overlooked, disregarded, 5-11, 185 lb. prospect out of Texas Tech. Making historically clutch plays. Spending time with super attractive celebrities. A true champion on and off the field. Danny Amendola played a crucial role in the Patriots Dynasty and will remembered forever.