The Mayor Of Naples Banned Fireworks On New Year's Eve Because Of COVID. The Residents Of Naples Responded By Lighting Off A Bazillion Fireworks Right In The Mayor's Face (Figuratively, Not Literally)
BELLISSIMO!!!
I'll be honest, I didn't know Italy had that in them. I thought the only fireworks you could find in the old country were those little firecrackers that kids lit in the street. Instead, the good people of Naples lit off 10 Macy's 4th Of July Spectaculars worth of big boy fireworks as a beautiful va fangul to their elected official as well as the virus completely buttfucking to world for damn near two years running.
I also fully admit that I have no clue if this is all actually what happened outside of a bunch of tweets going viral. But I am going to choose to believe it's true because it was awesome to watch and I am officially declaring this video as the moment humanity began to overcome COVID-19 once and for all with some paisan giving this speech before lighting the wick of the first mortar:
"We can't be consumed by our petty differences any more. We will be united in our common interest. Perhaps it's fate that this happened on New Year's Eve, and these Italians ushered in a new era. Not from tyranny, oppression, or persecution, but from annihilation. We're fighting for our right to live, to exist and should we win the day, the 1st of January will no longer be known as a calendar holiday, but as the day when the world declared in one voice, 'We will not go quietly into the night! We will not vanish without a fight! We're going to live on, we're going to survive.' Today we celebrate our New Year's Eve!"
Happy New Year everyone! Except you Covid. You can suck a dick.