Federal Agents Raided Subway Jared's House This Morning As Part Of A Child Porn Investigation

ZIONSVILLE, Ind. (July 7, 2015) – Federal authorities raided the home of Subway spokesman Jared Fogle Tuesday morning. FBI sources told FOX59 state and federal and state investigators were serving warrants at Fogle’s Zionsville home in connection with a child pornography investigation. The raid started around 6:30 a.m. Tuesday. Earlier this year, Russell Taylor, the former director of the Jared Foundation started by Fogle, was arrested in a child pornography case. Fogle said the foundation severed all ties with Taylor following the arrest. This is a developing story.

Whoops!  We simply can’t have heroes anymore.  Everybody has a dark side and that dark side is bound to come out eventually.  Even Subway Jared.  Pull back the curtain and who the fuck knows what you’re gonna find.  Turns out Subway Jared might be into some weird shit when it comes to the porn he watches.  Who would’ve thought? We’ve been seeing commercials with him holding up size 400 pants for a decade and a half now.  He’s been a constant.  “That’s the Subway guy”  The fat dude from Indiana who walked to Subway multiple times a day and lost a trillion pounds.  That’s the story we all knew.  The story we didn’t know?  Uhhhhhhh he may or may not have somehow been involved in child pornography.  Yikes.  Big time yikes.  The details of the story are pretty scarce so far but it’s never a good thing when the feds kick down your door at 6:30am and the words “child porn” are involved.  They don’t just kick down doors for fun.  That’s not really their thing.  Regardless of what comes of this, it’s a bad look for Subway Jared.  He might not be Subway Jared for much longer.  SMDH, Jared.  SMDH.  We’re all disappointed.

PS- On the flip side, should we really be all that surprised that a dude who has been slangin’ shitty sandwiches for 16 years is into some super fucked up shit?  Probably not.  That’s a weird life to live.  It’s kind of incredible that this dude has been famous for this long for one reason.  Maybe we should’ve seen this coming.