Paris Hilton Made $347,000 An Hour Being a Fake DJ in Ibiza, Making 2.7 Million in 4 Days

 

Bustle - By now, it’s quite clear that Paris Hilton gets paid a ton of money to basically be Paris Hilton. And I, for one, certainly wouldn’t mind a cushy gig like that, especially after hearing how much money she earns as a DJ. Supposedly, it’s somewhere near a gazillion dollars per job. OK, maybe not a gazillion but Complex reports Hilton made $2.7 million to DJ in Ibiza for four days, which is still a lot of coins, especially for such a short period of time. Sometimes it takes me up to four days to move a load of laundry a few inches from the washer to the dryer, at which point I’m forced to re-wash my clothes. That is utterly pitiful, I know, but the $347,000 an hour Hilton earns to play a few tunes is not.

 

That’s it, we’re done. We are DONE as a society. Let’s go rob banks and steal all the ice cream from the grocery stores and do as many drugs as possible, because life is stupid and karma doesn’t exist. All the kids getting eaten by flies in Africa and Chinese babies being flushed down the toilet if they’re girls, and all the while, Paris Hilton, most known for giving a very basic blow job, is making 2.7 million dollars in 4 days for hitting the play button in iTunes. Kill me. Just kill me, yourself, everyone. I’m not saying what she’s doing is “unfair”. Good for her. She was born into rich and fame, sucked a few dicks, swallowed a few loads, and look at her now! But goodness gracious. 2.7 million dollars for a filthy, dirty, disgusting, brutal, skanky, bottom-feading, trash-bag ho? To jump around on stage with headphones on? Preposterous.