Burger King Picking Up Entire Tab Of Couple Getting Married Inside A BK

Palm Beach Post – This will be a “whopper” of a wedding. Joel Burger and Ashley King of Illinois first met in kindergarten, earning the nickname “Burger-King” during a fifth-grade assembly.  “After the man was finished with his motivational speech, he asked the two fifth-grade [student council] representatives to stand up as he wanted the students to applaud our efforts in helping set up his event. As soon as he said, ‘Joel Burger and Ashley King,’ he started to laugh out loud and pronounced we were ‘Burger King,'” King told the The State Journal Register newspaper. Destined to be together, the two started dating in college, where the Burger-King nickname stuck. Now, their interesting surnames have earned them national attention. Joel proposed to Ashley at a lake and decided to take their engagement photos at their local Burger King. They reached out to the company to ask if they could use the brand’s logo on their wedding favors – and received an early wedding gift.  Burger King has generously offered to pick up the tab for the entire wedding, which will take place on July 17 in Jacksonville.

First thing’s first when I saw a couple was getting married at Burger King I immediately thought it was Big Cat and Pres. After this weekend I thought we were gonna have a civil union at BK. Chicken Fries out the ass for Dave and Dan after a romantic weekend away in Indianapolis.

But no. This is an actual Burger-King couple. Joel Burger and Ashley King. So, I get it. Their names are Burger King. That doesnt mean you gotta hold the most momentous day of your life at a local fast food joint. I mean dont get me wrong, sometimes I wake up and look at my bank account after my wedding this year and I wish I met a nice girl named Wendy and served Jr. Bacon Cheeseburgers and Frostys up on 125th street. I wish I met a girl named “Taco Bell” and I coulda eaten Cheesy Gordita Crunches in Penn Station. But I met a girl with a normal name and also I have an ounce or two of self respect. So as delicious as a cocktail hour with Chicken Fries sounds, and as much as flam broiled Whoppers would be a crowd pleaser as an entree, I think I’m gonna have to pass on getting married inside a Burger King in Jacksonville.

Checkers…now thats a different story. I’d get married in Checkers in a fucking heartbeat.

PS – If I ever did get married in a fast food place I’d make sure Pres’ table was in the parking lot. Maybe I’d put him in the drive thru lane and make him listen to the whole thing over the intercom.

UPDATE: This is some bullshit that BK is just picking up the tab on a normal wedding. I figured the whole point was that they did it inside a Burger King like all those couples who get married inside a White Castle on Valentines Day. This dicks get a free wedding because of their names and taking engagement photos at a fast food place? Fuck the Burger King Couple!