The Mount Rushmore Of 90s Carmen Electra Posters
Today is apparently Carmen Electra Day here at Barstool, which is kind of a bummer for me since I blogged the above video last night with some of Carmen's finest work ever. If you don't believe me, click on the blog.
*waiting*
*still waiting*
*what's taking them long? They aren't...*
Oh you're back! Good stuff, right? Well like I said in that blog, I would do a Mount Rushmore of Carmen's best posters that got countless of us through our formative years along with Jenny McCarthy, Pam Anderson, those two girls kissing in a bed, and a few other legendary pictures that got us through the day-to-day. Why? Because I love you guys...annnnnnnnnd because Smut + Nostalgia = Sweet Sweet Pageviews (I don't know if college kids still put posters up on their wall given the technological world we live in today, but the thrill of going to a Spencer Gifts and browsing posters one clang at a time before awkwardly paying about $10 or so for some smut then hanging it up with four thumbtacks was living).
The one ground rule I established is that I only chose posters with no nudity because I believe anybody that put up giant pictures of a naked person in their room could not be trusted under any circumstances.
Onto Mount Electra!
1. Cold Steel Carmen:
This may be the first on my mountain but lowest in my power rankings just because I always ended up thinking about how uncomfortable everything in that picture was. The handstand pose, the curved metal chair, the chainmail armor. Even the very sploogey shape of the name Carmen was off-putting to me.
2. Electra Blue:
Tasteful yet sexual. The epitome of Carmen Electra in one picture. Enough skin to grab your attention with enough clothes to let your imagination do the rest along with the shadow in the background that I never noticed until literally just now, which gave me instant flashbacks of the best thing to come out of the Phantom Menace: The poster for Phantom Menace that foreshadows Anakin Skywalker becoming Darth Vader:
Bet you didn't see a Star Wars reference coming when you clicked this blog
3. Gold Chain, Bronze Body:
When push comes to shove, this may be the sexiest of the bunch. I'm not sure if it's the pose, the picture, or what. It could definitely be the Playboy logo smack dab in the middle of the poster that always made you feel like a bad boy (non Detroid version) whenever you saw it. Top 5 logo ever that always reminds me of this classic:
4. Florida Chic
This poster would hit me like a lightning bolt every time I saw it. Was it due to Carmen's beauty or the proctology pop quiz that was sprung on me every time I saw it? I'm not sure. But I've since realized it is lowkey classy as hell with the bottle of champagne on the ground. If only Carmen could've saved a couple of bucks on those heels to give the table and chairs a fresh paint job, but hey beggars can't be choosers.
I imagine every other blogger ended their blogs like this, but I don't care and I'm sure neither do you. Happy Carmen Electra Day everybody!