Apple Doesn't Let Movie Villains Use iPhones

Well... shit. That's a pretty crazy, yet believable, movie fact.

"Apple lets you use iPhones in movies but, and this is very pivotal, if you're ever watching a mystery movie... bad guys cannot have iPhones on camera." (via Variety)

This obviously creates a problem for Rian Johnson with the sequel to 'Knives Out', because now he needs to hide all of the cell phones or we will immediately guess the villain's identity. Or, maybe Johnson knows Apple is changing their rules and is setting us up to be duped in the sequel?

Regardless, while this seems utterly ridiculous, I understand what Tim C̶o̶o̶k̶ Apple is going for here. Apple has had iPhone and iCloud hack issues in the past, so a sinister villain using their devices in a movie can't do anything but harm. It isn't like Apple ($207 BILLION in cash on hand) needs to product placement help for brand awareness.

So if the villains aren't going to use iPhones, what should they have instead? I have a few suggestions...

Nokia 3310

Classic phone, like, literally, the classic cell phone. Unassuming, but it gives off "burner phone" vibes and that might be a dead giveaway.

Verizon LG VX10000 Voyager with Touch Screen & Keyboard

I had this phone... but I didn't have texting for a little while so this phone was absolutely fucking useless.

Samsung Juke SCH-U470

If I recall correctly, this phone was supposed to act as some form of "Juke Box" and a music-centric device. It looked dumb, but might be cool for a villain to whip out mid-scene.

LG VX8500 Cherry Chocolate Phone

You were the fucking man if you had this phone back in (my) earl-high school, pre-iPhone days. Any villain with this phone would be a top-notch character.

The Danger Hiptop, aka the Sidekick

This was a phone made for movies. Seriously I only ever saw this phone in movies outside of the one person I went to high school with who had one. Villains from high school or college movies had Sidekick phones. It's time to bring them back. Give the villain of 'Knives Out 2' a Sidekick, Rian Johnson.

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So, what do we think, is Apple being too soft with this rule? Does it make sense? Also, how excited are you for the 'Knives Out' sequel? I know I am... (just give the villain a sick early-to-mid-2000s phone)...

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