Michigan Is Holding OPEN TRYOUTS For Regular Students Who Could Help Their Football Team

Hahahahhahahahahhah!

(deep breath)

Hahahahhahahhahahahahahhahahahah!

Is this real? Are they looking for the next Rudy or what? I mean, call me old school, but I prefer my team to construct our roster from the 85 full ride scholarships that FBS teams are allowed to offer recruits (which my team does VERY WELL).

But I guess the way it works is that the players actually have to accept your free invitation to go to school and play football there.....which puts Michigan in quite the pickle. No one wants to play for 3rd in the Big Ten! Oops, I misread that. ***3rd in the Big Ten EAST. So when recruiting dries up, I guess desperate times call for desperate measures. And folks, these are desperate times:

Zero 5-Star Recruits??? I guess that's why you gotta have open tryouts! Maybe there's a diamond in the rough that the scouting services all missed, then he decided to go to Michigan as a common student, and now he's ready to lead the Wolverines back to the glory of the 1800s!

Ok, I'm obviously kidding....about part of that. There's no way that 247 and Rivals and ESPN would miss a 5-star talent. But I would say it's very possible that there's someone walking around campus in Ann Arbor right now that could help out that football team. I mean, combine the fact that Michigan stinks with the fact that every time a student is shown on TV is so physically imposing, and it's a complete no brainer!

Nevermind. They don't need any more 5'10 125 pound white guys on their roster. For someone that looks like a typical University of Michigan student to contribute to a Division 1 football team....well, they would need a lot of heart. A LOT of heart. 

I think I know just the guy......

You gotta try out, Michigan Man. And if Harbaugh decides to cut you, well, you know what to do....