Old Man Uses A Broken Club Shaft To Stab The Guy He's Golfing With Because He Lied About Strokes

Feitelberg 6/7/2013 4:15 PM

Oakland Township — Golf is supposedly a relaxing pastime but one man is in jail and his fellow golfer nursing injuries Friday following a dispute on a Metro Detroit golf course this week. Oakland County Sheriff’s deputies were called to the Westwynd Golf Club in the 4400 block of Adams Road at 1:09 p.m. Thursday on a report that one golfer had attacked another on the course in what could be a scene out of the comedy film, “Caddyshack.” A preliminary investigation found that a 59-year-old Oakland Township man had argued with a 65-year-old West Bloomfield Township man over the number of strokes the younger man had taken on a particular hole. The Oakland Township man allegedly struck the West Bloomfield Township man over the arm with his golf club, breaking the head off the club, on the 12th hole. Further enraged by his broken club — a Callaway 5-iron — the younger man then allegedly stabbed the man in the arm with the shaft of the club, according to investigators. Two other men, who were golfing with the pair as a foursome, reportedly held the suspect down while the victim sped off in a golf car to the clubhouse for safety, according to a deputy’s report. The suspect eventually broke loose and gave chase in a second cart screaming he was “going to get him,” according to witnesses.

Need to know one thing about this story: was there money on the line. That’s literally the only thing that matters. If there was no money on the line and this was a friendly game, then the stabber is guilty and he should go to jail. Nothing worse than the stroke Nazi when you’re out there on a nice day just trying to catch a buzz and relax. If it’s just for fun then who gives a fuck about strokes. But if there was money on the line? Or if there was some kind of agreement reached for sincere competition? Innocent as all fuck. Lying about strokes while actually playing is the lowest of the low. Deserve everything that’s coming your way even if it is a pierced spleen courtesy of a Callaway.