Analyzing Jerry Ferrara’s Role on the Pickup Basketball Court

Today’s Pardon My Take guest is Jerry Ferrara. Known for his role as “Turtle” on Entourage and “Joe Proctor” on Power, Ferrara chatted with Mr. Cat and Mr. Commenter about various topics, including the state of New York sports and E-Sports. It was cool learning more about Jerry Ferrara the actor and sports fan but hearing about his role on the hardwood playing basketball was awesome as well. Below is a transcript from a portion of today’s interview discussing pickup hoops:

Jerry Ferrara: I’m 39 years old, and I’m not an athlete. But when I go play pick-up basketball, my brain knows what to do, but my body doesn’t know what to do. I can only imagine doing that at the pro level, but I do think he [Eli] deserves a shot and we’ll see after like five games.

Mr. Cat: What’s your game like in pickup basketball?

Jerry Ferrara: Now, it’s a little more Andre Miller with a good three. With a really good three.

Mr. Cat: So, you just run 3-point line to 3-point line? Or are you getting dirty and trying to get some rebounds?

Jerry Ferrara: No, I don’t want to get hurt anymore. I’ve gotten too many, like, seven stitches under my eye, this tooth knocked out. I’m too small and old. I really just want to be the guy that shoots threes and distributes the ball. I want to be the guy that’s like ‘I like playing with that guy. He’s a good teammate.’

Mr. Cat: Do you at least call out picks when your teammate is about to get picked?

Jerry Ferrara: I always call out picks. Because when you’re my size and your teammate doesn’t call out a pick, and you get crushed and your neck snaps back, it’s unpleasant.

Mr. Cat: I’d pick you to death. If I threw a pick on you, you would be in a fucking body bag.

Mr. Commenter: Have you reached the point in your pickup life where you’re the one setting unnecessary screens? I try to set a screen and they look at me like, we don’t need a screen from this guy.

Mr. Cat: I know the type of pickup guy you are. If you’re hitting your shot, I’m happy you’re on my team. If you’re not, I’m like, ‘This fucking guy is not doing anything.’

Jerry Ferrara: No, that’s not entirely true. Because if I miss my first two, I’m not shooting anymore. I play D. I’ve got fast hands. I’m just not looking for contact. If there’s contact involved, I am avoiding that, and I feel like I’ve earned the right at 39-years-old. I love that we are breaking down my pickup game.

Mr. Cat: Well, it’s important. It tells a lot about a person. How’s Marky Mark as a pickup basketball player?

Jerry Ferrara: Wahlberg is a really good athlete.

Mr. Cat: That was a very sneaky way to say he sucks at basketball.

Jerry Ferrara: No, no, no. I think he plays a lot more golf than basketball nowadays, but the few times I played with him, he was really, really fast. Lefty, so, throwing you a different look. Mark’s a good athlete.

Mr. Cat said it best. The way you play pickup basketball says A LOT about who you are as a person. The guy who chucks up threes any time he touches the ball can get annoying, especially when he’s like “My bad” after a brick. Yeah, no fucking shit it’s your bad, Kyle! You had two guys wide open under the basket.

It’s good to know the Jerry doesn’t fall under that category, though. If he’s not feeling the shot, he will put on a self-imposed ban on any more field goal attempts. Knowing your role is a huge part of team success in pickup basketball, and Turtle seems like a guy who could be a valuable asset, especially if taken in the later rounds.