China Opens Its First Costco And Things Go Exactly How You'd Expect

Despite what the headline says, this is not what I expected at all. I expected there to be mass chaos. I expected to see 1.99 hotdogs with a drink flying all over the fucking joint. I expected cheap slices of delicious pizza to be hitting folks in the face.

I expected to see dog beds, 3 dozen eggs, bags of milk, industrial size goldfish cracker boxes strung about the aisles and I expected to see cart after cart filled with delicious yet affordable Kirkland-branded wines. No toilet paper. No diapers. Just laundry detergent. In reality, this video makes me appreciate my Costco membership (I’m an executive-level member) even more because I’ve had it long enough to know what the good shit is. People in China fighting over Costco laundry detergent makes me value America a little more this morning because we all know that Costco branded products are at the lowest prices every day. No reason to stock up on that stuff.