Russian Hovercraft Rolls Up On The Beach Like It Ain't No Thang

Telegraph – A Russian Navy hovercraft surprises sunbathers by landing on a packed beach during a military exercise. Amateur footage shows the vast hovercraft powering towards the shore packed with hundreds of sunbathers. People on the beach can be seen taking photos and filming the extraordinary sight before them. A spokesperson for the Russian defence ministry was reported by alocal newspaper as saying that “docking at the beach … is a normal event,” as the hovercraft was on a tactical mission in a military owned area. It has been suggested that the hovercraft is a Russian Navy Zubr-type which can travel at speeds of up to 68 mph. The vessel is usually equipped with missile launchers, automatic gun mounts and mine-laying devices.

Just your average day in Russia where goddam battleship spacecraft boats cruise up on the beach while you’re playing Kan Jam and catching rays. Or whatever the fuck you do on a Russian beach. Who even knew there was beaches in Russia? My favorite part about this is the spokesperson from the defense ministry. “This is a normal event” in a “military owned area.” So turns out the weird part of this is not the 900 foot long hovercraft cruising up to the beach, but the fact that the military beach is filled up with like a billion people. It would be like if a bunch of people were sunbathing in Area 51 or some shit. Fucking Russia. Everything backwards. Who knows whats going on.

All I do know is that this:

Was the best and worst remote control toy of all time. Absolutely one of the most exciting things that ever happened to me as a kid was when I got this RC hovercraft. Followed immediately by one of the most disappointing thins of my childhood when I realized it was an absolute piece of shit and completely false advertising in the commercial. I bet in Russia these things actually whipped around on concrete, sand, and water like the commercial showed.

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