WARNING: These Pictures of Keanu Reeves May Curse Your Entire Fucking Bloodline

I totally understand why ‘Bill and Ted Face The Music’ director Ed Solomon felt it was necessary for Keanu to shave. He’s trying to shake off the recent imagery of bearded-Keanu which is nothing badass. ‘John Wick’, ‘Cyberpunk 2077′, “Always Be My Maybe’, ’47 Ronin’ etc etc. and bring back the innocent, babyface Keanu. That said, what the fuck. What the fucking fuck in the fucking fuck. FUCK NO! 100% FUCK THIS!!!!! After seeing these pictures, I feel exactly as I did in the title of this blog. I think my whole bloodline is cursed. I felt all 2 of my sperm that survived my adolescence of no-buffer laptop heat and gallons of energy drinks shrivel up and die like a salted slug. If I ever have a child, it will have scaled skin and the wings of a bat a la Daenerys in Game of Thrones. That is what these images have done to me. That said, I will still probably watch the movie.

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