It Sounds Like the XFL Won't Test for Marijuana

SI has a profile of XFL commissioner Oliver Luck. He’s the father of Andrew, a former backup QB with the Houston Oilers and has worked for NFL Europe, MLS and the NCAA. It’s an interesting read. The guy does really seem to have his shit together and is trying to learn from the past mistakes of the old XFL and the AAF debacle.

To me, the AAF never held my attention because it never gave me a reason to be interested. There were no compelling storylines. No players I was curious about. It was just a droid army of guys in gear playing football. Badly. I’d rather watch an Ivy League game because at least the schools have history between them and you know somebody, somewhere, is emotionally invested in the outcome.

Which begs the question: What do Luck and Vince McMahon plan to do to get the public’s attention and hold onto it? And we might have an answer:

McMahon was more temperate and stately in January 2018 when he announced on a YouTube livestream that the new XFL would begin play in 2020. This time the games would be faster, safer, “fan-centric” and played in less than three hours. … McMahon said, would be required to stand for the national anthem. Beyond that, specifics were sparse.

So they’ve weighed options as far as changing the dimensions of the field, shortening the play clock to 30 seconds, earpieces in every players helmet, letting the refs hear the play so they know what to focus on, and some gimmicky overtime format where each team gets the ball at their opponent’s 5-yard line. None of which I think would be a difference maker. But this one most definitely would:

Though Luck says he has softened McMahon’s original hard-line stance against players with any criminal history—it is now zero tolerance for credible accusations of felonies and domestic violence, with misdemeanors interpreted individually—he said in March he was unsure whether the XFL would welcome Johnny Manziel, who since then played two games for the AAF’s Memphis Express. And while the commish says he would “prefer not to test for marijuana,” he concedes he has not thought about how the XFL would handle a player like Josh Gordon, who has been suspended repeatedly by the NFL for using the drug, but without any attendant legal issues.

Houston, this is Tranquility Base. The Eagle has landed.

Allowing guys to smoke weed without fear of retribution would be a total difference maker. Of course you keep out the true scumbags. Because while America will watch them play violent sports – and cheer for them and buy their merchandise because we’ve done it time and time again – we don’t feel good about it. But who’s left in this country who really still has their panties twisted about a guy smoking pot? Especially a guy who plays a game where his cerebrum is getting slammed against his temporal bone like a bumper car 60 times a game? Maybe there’s still a few holdouts in the Bible Belt or Utah or someplace. But offending a few backwards moralists is nothing compared to the utter hypocrisy of the NFL still coming down harder on players who show traces of cannabis in their pee than players who put their wives and kids in mortal fear.

Besides, since the key ginning up interest in your fledgling league is to give people a compelling product to watch, what faster way could there be to lure quality athletes with name recognition than by welcoming the cannabis users? We’ve seen first hand with guys like Josh Gordon how badly they want to be able to use. So much so that even knowing they’re one failed test with the Urine Squad away from getting suspended and losing checks doesn’t always get them to put the bong away. Imagine there being a league that gives them an alternative? A way to earn a living playing the game they love while consuming the edibles they love. The XFL will attract more Pro Bawl-caliber players than they’ll lose TV viewers. Not to mention, they’ll bring in that younger, snack food-consuming stoner demographic advertisers love so much.

And if they do allow it, the NFL will have no choice but to reverse their own outdated, idiotic policy. They can throw the rest of the rule change proposals into the shredder as far as I’m concerned. But this one is genius.