Is This The Sexiest Koala On The Planet? I'd Find It Very Hard To Say No
Fox – A koala in an Australian wildlife sanctuary has become an unlikely social media star after an image of the macho marsupial went viral.
Rogue the koala struck the creepily suggestive pose at Currumbin Wildlife Sanctuary on Australia’s Gold Coast. People reports that photographer Ross Long captured the image and posted it to his Instagram account, quickly turning Rogue into a star.
Check this sexy son of a bitch out. He knows exactly what he’s doing. He knows how hot he is. It doesn’t matter if you’re human, donkey, koala, whatever. You don’t hit that pose unless you know you’re a sexy bastard. There’s just so much self confidence in those eyes. It’s that kind of sexy that allows you to refer to women as “baby girl” and it comes off smooth as shit, rather than creeping them out to death.
And with a name like “Rogue”? How do you even compete with that? That name is so bad ass. It would be one thing if this koala was sexy as heck but he had a bum ass name like Carl or something. Imagine if he was a Steve? I’m sure that Steve the koala is a nice enough guy. The kind of guy who you can bring back to your parents’ house, he’ll be super cordial with your grandma, he’ll be great with the nieces and nephews and everything. But Rogue the koala? Rogue comes in and he absolutely rocks your world. You’re not bringing Rogue home to meet your parents but the next time you go home, you’re going to have to hide that tattoo you decided to get while you were with him because Rogue just makes you do crazy things.
The only downside to Rogue’s life is that he’s afraid he’ll never find true love. Sure, he had plenty of fun while he was in his 20’s and his early 30’s. But after a while, you can only have so many one night stands. You can only have so many relationships that fizzle out after a couple of weeks. Rogue knows he can have any female koala he wants, but once it comes time to make the commitment, he just can’t seem to hold on to the good ones. He’s afraid he’ll never find true love because he’s afraid of love itself. It’s probably going to take a nerdy female koala to come into his life and show him that he’s capable of loving another koala. And then she takes her hair out of her pony tail, takes her glasses off, and turns out she’s the most beautiful koala that Rogue has ever seen. But he doesn’t love her for her beauty on the outside. He learns that it’s what’s on the inside that really matters. That’s true love. Finding your soul’s counterpoint in another.