Texting Is Stupid And Is Hereby Cancelled

I just joined cancel culture last week and I admit that I’m already drunk with power, but texting is cancelled. It’s stupid. It’s a time suck of uselessness. Now there are some good texters, my dear pal Kmarko and I have a beautiful texting relationship, you ask a quick question and get a quick response. But far too many people use texting as a never-ending conversation. There’s no beginning, no end, just a constant stream of meaningless jibber jabber. I’ve got a friend who texts me during Bruins games like he’s sitting right next to me. Just hits me with messages like “phew” and “oh shit” constantly throughout the game. Those kind of texters are cancelled. You want to talk to me? Call me. Only topics that are worth a phone call deserve even being discussed. 96% of conversations never need to happen and 100% of text conversations don’t need to happen.

Listen to the full episode with our pal Ken Jeong here.

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