World Oldest Porn Found - 3,000 Years Old - Found In China (Surprise Surprise!)

Slate – The Kangjiashimenji Petroglyphs are bas-relief carvings in a massive red-basalt outcropping in the remote Xinjiang region of northwest China. The artwork includes the earliest—and some of the most graphic—depictions of copulation in the world.

You really just dont stand a chance of being normal sexually if you’re from China, do you? Like here we are thinking all their weird Asian porn is something new. A recent fad of pixelation and simulated rape and bukkake. Nope. Turns out the Chinese have been kinky sons of bitches for just over 3 millennia now. I mean look at this goddam Petroglyphs! That guy from yesterday Sen Luo who’s facing jail time for extreme pornography wouldn’t even be able to handle this. Lets break it down –

Zebras

There’s fucking zebras up in this orgy. I’ve seen a lot of kinky shit in my day but I’ve never seen Zebras at a gangbang.

This Chick

is getting absolutely fucked. I don’t even know what position that that is. All I know is she’s about 1/5th the size of the dude fucking her, her vagina looks like a tunnel, and that guy’s monster dick and balls looks like a skeleton key.

This guy doesn’t even have a fucking head

Bro what happened to your head! You’ve got a soup ladle for a dick. You could serve chicken noodle with that thing. Its roughly 4 feet long. I could spring off your dick like diving board at the country club pool. But your fucking head is in your girl’s armpit! The fuck is that about?

This chick has 2 fucking heads

Soup Ladle Dick has zero heads and this GIANT bitch has two heads. Thats some kinky shit, China. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Siamese Twin porn. Maybe a double blowjob is in order with the two dudes on either side of you. That one guy is wearing a t shirt that has his own face on the front. You know he fucks like a champ.

This guy has a dick in the front and the back

Hey bro! There’s a dick coming out of your ass!

Good grief, China. I’ll never bash an Asian perv again. It all came from their ancestors. Its part of their DNA.