Enes Kanter Ate 7 Cheeseburgers With Fries Then Left Practice The Next Day With An "Illness"

Toughhhhh look here for Enes Kanter. One day he is (rightfully) saying he is going to stay in the states while the Knicks play in London because he doesn’t want to get his ass murdered by the Turkish government, the next he is leaving practice early less than 24 hours after eating an entire cow’s worth of cheeseburgers. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not here to shame cheat meals. If you want to have a cheat meal, cheat day, or cheat week, I’ll be cheering you on the entire time and may even join you. I have a hard enough time trying to eat decent as a blogger. I couldn’t FATHOM the clean eating that pro athletes have to endure during the season. If you treat your body like a gas station instead of a temple, you may end up with the career arc and current contract of Eddy Lacy. If you factor in variables like your homeland’s government coming for your neck and that you have been benched because opposing teams run the pick-and-roll more than Stockton and Malone when you are in the game, there has never been a more acceptable time for Kanter to try to eat more burgers in 2019 than Glenny has.

But posting that video is like posting a video of you getting wasted on a work night. If you have to leave early the next day, everyone’s going to think you couldn’t hang because your body is locked in a civil war against itself. Same thing goes if you call out the day after the Super Bowl. You could have eaten nothing but salad during “The Big Game” (get ready to hear that a million times in a couple of weeks), gone to bed at 9 pm, and gotten hit by a car. But all your coworker’s are still going to think you are a hungover asshole that couldn’t make it to work while they grind away a day that is moving in slow motion. Putting your shit on social media for those retweets and likes just isn’t worth the headaches. At least Mario Hezonja found some humor in the situation.

But seriously, lets just get Enes Kanter’s ass off of the Knicks ASAP for another expiring. I’m not even asking for another asset. If we can attach him with Lee or Hardaway or whatever is needed to get a max slot, I’m in and will buy Kanter Five Guys for his trip to the fucking airport.

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