Couple Gets Arrested for Skinny Dipping and Having Sex on a Family Beach
Source – A skinny-dipping couple on vacation in Florida was allegedly busted getting hot and heavy at the beach — while families were trying to cool off in the ocean, according to reports.
Tiana Maranville, 26, and her husband, Alexander Maranville, 27, were arrested Saturday afternoon for indecent exposure on a Sanibel beach, news station WFXT reported.
Police said they responded to outraged calls about the frisky couple around 4 p.m. and found the wife completely naked at the beach in front of children.
Several witnesses told officers they saw the couple have sex in the water and they were roaming the shore naked.
Tiana Maranville admitted to police that she entered the water topless, but lost her bathing suit bottom on accident, according to officials.
Her husband then approached the officers and argued about the legality of swimming nude, saying … they didn’t know that nudity at a public beach was illegal because they were on vacation from Vermont.
Credit where credit is due, that was a nice recovery by Alexander Maranville. Good job of thinking on his feet. Any police officer with a knowledge of geography trivia would immediately recognize that Vermont is the only New England state not on the ocean, thereby making it at least plausible he was not aware it’s illegal to traipse around with your funny business out.
A couple of things about that, though. One, I’ve spent some of my best vacations ever on Lake Champlain, VT, which has beaches all over the place, none of whom have couples walking around in broad daylight hanging brain in front of other people and their children.
Secondly, and most importantly, that’s not the kind of thing you just take an educated guess on. If it’s your intention to bang your wife in the ocean and then casually stroll around with your dong and vag flapping around in the sea breeze, you really want to do your homework. Or at the very least, look around and see that no one else is boning in the water or pretending their bathing suit came off “on accident.” You know the expression, when you “assume,” your ugly zit-covered “ass” will get “u” locked the fuck up by “me” and everyone else with cell service who doesn’t want to look at it.
Finally, have you ever noticed that nobody ever makes one “bad decision?” I mean, we all have accidents or make mistakes. But truly terrible life decision making isn’t something you just do on occasion. You don’t dabble in it. You either never do it or it’s your lifestyle. Show me a husband and wife team where he looks like Lyle Lovett after a six-month meth binge and “Breaking the Cycle” on his chest and she has a massive neck tat of a flower made with a Spirograph and I’ll show you a couple who’ll be ruining the day of hundreds of beach goers with their sloppy sex hijinks. It’s all part of the same thought process. Get a room.