Paulina Gretzky Just Posted A Cryptic Instagram Story, An Investigation

Paulina Gretzky just posted that on Instagram. What does it mean?

Let’s investigate.

The first thing that jumped out was the song she was playing

A couple things about the song choice:

1) I looked at the lyrics and these stuck out

I’d be jealous too, if she was with you
I’d be out my mind, watching her move

Hmmmmmmm those lyrics curiously seem to fit well with what’s reportedly going on between Paulina and Dustin Johnson. The report came out that DJ got a little too friendly with a golf socialite named Yassie Safai and Paulina was pissed about it. Some might say she was jealous that DJ was hanging around with a golf socialite. Watching her move. Watching her move.

2) The singer’s name is Dustin. Her fiancee’s name is Dustin Johnson. ???????????

Last thing, why isn’t there an engagement ring on her finger?

Pretty strange. If they were trying to work things out like DJ’s tweet seemed to imply then she’d still be wearing her engagement ring. Now you might be saying, “But Trent, that’s her right hand. Rings are traditionally worn on the left hand you dum dum” but you’d be wrong. That’s actually her left hand touching her face and her right hand holding the phone. Instagram stories flip everything around when you take them.

I did it myself to prove it

See? In that picture I’m holding my phone with my right hand and sensually touching my face with my left hand. Instagram mirrors what you’re doing and flips it around so your right hand looks like your left and vice versa. Paulina should be wearing a ring on the hand we’re seeing. I consulted with a couple of female sources around the office and they said that Paulina’s way too done up to have just woken up. Which means she made a point to get out of bed, put on makeup, get back into bed and take the Instagram story. That means she had the opportunity to put her engagement ring on and didn’t. Peculiar. It also means she wanted to look as hot as possible to make DJ jealous. Could be another reason for the song choice.

So what does it all mean? Nothing can be said definitively but it certainly doesn’t bode well for DJ and Paulina’s relationship going forward. Last night I said that I would bet on Paulina being at the Ryder Cup alongside DJ. I no longer feel that way after breaking down her cryptic Instagram story.

Journalism never sleeps.

Story still developing…………………….

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