In An Unfortunate Series Of Events, Mia Khalifa Will Need To Get Surgery After Getting Hit By A Hockey Puck In The Titty

NYPost – Porn star turned sports presenter Mia Khalifa is undergoing surgery after her left boob was left “deflated” after being struck by a hockey puck.

The 25-year-old was watching a Capitals playoff game when the 6-ounce puck smashed into her chest. And the Caps and West Ham fan has revealed she has to go under the knife at the start of next year to fix her breast. The American-Lebanese babe told the Daily Star: “I was sitting behind the glass during a game, and it came shooting over the glass and it caught me so off guard and I had no idea it was coming.

I understand that it’s Monday morning and most people would rather ease their way into the work week. And yeah, maybe this headline is a little too heavy to smack you in the face with before you’ve had your 4th cup of Monday morning coffee. But I’m a journalist. And it’s my duty to bring you the facts, no matter how hard hitting those facts may be. And the fact right now is that Mia Khalifa is going to need to undergo a surgical procedure after she was struck by a hockey puck directly in the left titty. Now while this is certainly an unfortunate situation, the fact of the matter here is that injuries are just a part of the game and there’s nothing you can really do about it. Doesn’t matter if you’re on the ice or in the crowd. Hockey is a violent game–it’s what we love about it. Every once in a while, you may end up just having a deflated left titty on your hands. That’s just the way she goes, ya know?

The good news here is that it seems like Mia Khalifa was extremely Hockey Tough about the entire ordeal. For starters, it looked like she remained at the game until it was over.

Basketball fans would have left immediately after taking a puck to the tit. But not Mia Khalifa. Tough as nails, stayed in the game and it all paid off. Heck, in true hockey fashion we aren’t even hearing about the disclosed injury until well after the playoffs are over. It was just marked down as an “Upper Body Injury” for the longest time. Couldn’t give the other team any sort of advantage by knowing the exact details of the injury. A couple months go by and all of a sudden we finally get to hear those details. Deflated left titty. Requires surgery. Will be listed as day-to-day. So all things considered, you have to give her credit here. Took the puck to the tit like a champ, stayed in the game, and didn’t get playoff-ending surgery because she decided to wait until a later date to go under the knife. Am I saying that Mia Khalifa’s deflated left titty is the sole reason why the Washington Capitals won the 2018 Stanley Cup? Not exactly. But I’m also not saying that it didn’t have anything to do with it either.

P.S. – I’m not going to post pictures here considering the majority of you are at work right now. But here’s a link for later.

@BarstoolJordie

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