Friday Homestretch/AFTP
“It’s the freakin’ weekend, baby. I’m about to have me some fun.” -R. Kelly, Ignition
“Stop pissing on me… I’m only 16.” -R. Kelly’s date
Happy Friday, all.
Most people know, but for those who don’t, there’s a very basic investment strategy called the “seasonal trade.” It’s where you go long a stock before a certain time of year that is beneficial to the company.
For example, some people would buy Apple before any new iPhone launch. Some buy apparel retailers in front of Back-To-School season. For those born after 2017, there was once this national chain of toy stores called Toys R Us, and people would purchase their stock before Christmas. I traded Utilities for a LOOONG time, and there would be intermittent spikes in a stock I barely knew called Pike Electric. I finally learned that Pike actually replaced damaged telephone and utility poles, so people would load up on that name before a hurricane touched down in the Southern part of the US.
I bring up seasonal trades for one reason… It is so fucking hot in NYC this week, I wish I loaded up on whatever company makes Gold Bond Medicated Baby Powder, because I am re-applying that magical talc to my undercarriage almost hourly. Red wine and vodka do not have an exceptionally long shelf life in my household, and Gold Bond now needs to be added to that list.
Markets giving back some ground today with the NASDAQ poised to surrender its 8 day win streak. Seems like US investors are tracking the global equity retreat that was fueled by a mounting currency crisis in Turkey… The country, not the bird.
ON THIS DAY IN HISTORY- The first movie ever with a PG-13 rating was released on this day in 1984. Before that we had only movies rated G, PG, R and X (now NC-17).
It was Red Dawn, starring the late and kinda great Patrick Swayze. A fictional tale of Soviet soldiers invading a small Colorado town, and the group of 30 year old high-schoolers who decided to fight back.
There was a remake a few years back (also called Red Dawn), where the Soviet devils were replaced with North Koreans, and it starred the guy who plays Thor and the “vibracious” Adrianne Palicki.
And there is another remake of Red Dawn being filmed as we speak, where a group of elderly African-American gents are trying to take back Brooklyn from invading liberal hipsters… The working title is Bed-Stuy Dawn.
Little change of pace, but something that I love about NY… Or just about life in general… Is that this still exists…
By the way, I just checked, and you can get first fucking row for only $15? And this is the type of event where the closer you are, the better… For obvious reasons (they’re tiny midgets).
I have been to Mulcahy’s before. It’s been around for 50 years, or so. The awning used to say- “Long Island’s Home For Good Clean Fun.” I looked up “good clean fun” in the dictionary, and there was no mention of doing coke in a bathroom stall while Twisted Sister played live music just 50 feet away, so I am not sure those were the best 3 words to describe the Mulcahy’s experience.
Last week’s Ass From The Past was 77 year old Raquel Welch. This week, I am going much younger. A girl who was the hottest broad in the world 11 years ago, and has since faded into Bolivian.
She’s a former Victoria’s Secret model, Sports Illustrated Swimsuit edition cover girl, and in 2008, she became the first spokesperson in motorcycle manufacturer Harley Davidson’s 100 year history.
It’s Marissa Miller and her sandy iPod…
Miller was a spokesperson for the NFL in 2011, had a nice sized roll in a terrible 2013 movie called RIPD with Ryan Reynolds, and once filmed a TV commercial for Activision’s video game Guitar Hero: World Tour that was deemed “too sexy to air.”
There are literally thousands of scantly clad gifs out there that I could’ve opted for here, but for some reason, I like this understated clip from her visit to Conan.
She turned 40 last week, is married, and has 2 kids (YUCK!)… And is now officially a member of AFTP.
Good weekend all… Take many reports.
-Large