Congratulations To Willson Contreras & The Country Venezuela On His 2018 All Star Selection

Carl 7/8/2018 10:24 PM

First things first, congratulations to Javy Baez as well on his All Star selection. In the spirit of the Thai Soccer boys I’ll be doing a Deep Dive on Javy Baez’s MVP candidacy in a separate blog. For now, let’s focus on the heart and spirit of Venezuela as the 26 year-old making $604,000 this year en route to a 5.5+ WAR year enjoys his first All Star bid:

I’m not getting emotional, I’m just laying out facts. The guy was a nobody for SEVEN minor league seasons. Again 26 years old so sit on that for a second. Willy literally toiled around the minors, fucking around at 3rd base for the better part of 5 years hitting something insignificant. Really none of this matters outside of setting the stage that he wasn’t very good until *he* decided to play catcher one day in the minors while warming someone up and blah blah blah. Next thing you know he’s leading the Cubs to World Series glory and captivating the universe in the process.

But there are haters. There will always be haters. Willson started slow this year. His power numbers were down. His sex drive was down. The MLB stripped him of his Venezuelan sleeve. Everything was pointed down.

Not my launch angle – Willson.

In reality, Willson modeled consistency from Day 1 starting with his electricity. It’s undeniable that everyone gravitates to him, regardless of his receiving skills or fundamental understanding of pitch calling. Guy fucking WANTS it and that’s how you go from being a mindless 17 year-old signing to the NL All Star Starting Catcher. Hold on quick look at Yadi Molina

I’m a bitch – Yadi

That’s right Yadi. Even tho I respect you and your remarkable ability to not get caught using steroids, you are a little bitch from here on out as this division, league and Leage now officially belong to Willson Contreras.

On the subject of Official and on a more serious note, I want to point out that this is a huge win for Venezuela. I’ve been watching the World Cup as hard as any North American who hates their 9-5 and I can tell you Venezuela’s absence in the World’s Greatest Tournament Ever Of All Time is making Willson play harder. That’s a fact. Here’s another fact.

Big Cat and the President of Venezuela are basically the same guy (minus Big Cat not being directly responsible for a lot of bad things). I’m not getting political I’m just looking at the facts/mustaches: