Shoe Camera Explodes When Pervy Pervererson Tries To Takes Some Upskirt Videos

5) WEST: Information/Sex Offense – 5:24pm. Officers at the West Police District station were contacted by a subject (32-year-old HM) who wanted to turn himself in to police. The subject reported he had purchased a shoe camera that he intended to use to take “upskirt” videos of females, but the camera battery had exploded prior to obtaining any video, injuring the subject’s foot. The subject was counseled on his actions and released from the scene as no illicit video had been taken. Investigation continuing.

The above quote is from the chief of police from Madison, Wisconson’s log.

I hate to say it, but it sounds like the subject of this log entry is a little bit of a pervert. He got real horny watching some CamGirls on Youporn and before he masturbated, he found himself on Amazon looking for shoe cameras. Never a good idea. He was too damn horny and made some mistakes that could have landed him in jail or the hospital.

At least we know that our creep felt bad about what he did. He got his brains blown back in by nearly getting his foot blown off. Imagine sitting there with a bloody foot, your erection gone, and there’s seemingly no other right move for you to make except to go to the police station and turn yourself in. You ready yourself to spend some long nights in jail and then the officers tell you that intending to commit a crime isnt a crime at all.

I wonder if Amazon has the same 30-day return policy for shoe cameras. Kinda feels like those should be like dildos. Once you buy it, it’s yours forever.

In all honesty, I need to hear what this dude said to the cops. Someone who is prone to taking upskirt videos probably did it in a really strange way. You don’t just tell someone that you blew your foot to pieces trying to get upskirt pictures in a normal conversational tone. You do it theatrically, I bet. I bet he did it through song. Something like