Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino Was Arrested After Getting In A Fist Fight With His Brother At His Tanning Salon, Which All In All Has To Be The Least Shocking News Of All time

(CNN) — Former “Jersey Shore” star Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino was charged with simple assault after a fight in a tanning salon he co-owns with his brother. Video captured by Splash News showed a smiling Sorrentino walking out of the Middletown, New Jersey, police station after posting a $500 bond Tuesday afternoon. His right eye appeared bruised and scratches were visible on his neck. The Situation told the photographer that the fight happened because his brother “was not running the store correctly, so I had to go in there and clean house, in more ways than one.” Sorrentino, 31, was the only person charged in the fight, according to Police Lt. Stephen Dollinger.

This has to be the least shocking news of all time right? First the Situation bought a tanning salon with all his Jersey Shore money, totally expected, life imitating art. Then he had his brother run said tanning salon because no way was he actually going to work, zero percent shock in that. And then when his brother inevitably fucked something up he went and fist fought him to “clean house” and show him how a real business is run, inevitable outcome to anything in the Situation’s life. All in all if you asked for odds on this headline 5 years ago I don’t think the book would release them, like College Football week 1 Money Line when FSU plays a 1-A opponent, just too likely too happen, no gain in exposing themselves to something that had a 1 billion percent chance of coming through. It’s like the old Mad Libs books you used to play as a kid. The Situation being arrested outside of his tanning salon for fist fighting with his brother was in everyone’s little flip book.

I will say this though, at least the Situation is staying true to who he is, as awful as that may be, that has to count for something.

PS

Do you even steroid bro?